I often wake up early when Eric decides in his old age now, that he needs to get up before the rooster crows. As I watch him get up -- stumble across the obstacle course of a room, trip over the toys on the floor, weave around the huge bed in a small room, and wobble down the stairs without falling--it so amuses me and makes me giggle thus starting my day with a smile. His disorientation is really funny to watch... Such a giant of a man, strong and secure in himself and his relationships with us and His Lord --yet, as he wakes and tries to set his course for the day --he is a weak and wobbly boy.
We too are like this...not only in the morning, but throughout life. We can get sleepy and fall off course -- and when we do, we become disoriented and have to again wobble around trying to find our way. It is good to know that our Lord knows the direction we are headed -- and throws obstacles in our path to disorient us and move us to the direction He is wishing us to go. Mark Batterson in his book The Wild Goose Chase, talks to this very issue. He says, "God is far more concerned about your future than you are....Not only does God want us to get where God wants us to go more than we want to get where God wants us to go, but He is awfully good at getting us there....God is in the business of positioning us in the right place at the right time."pp128-129
While it is not as fun as experiencing the wobbly disorientation yourself as it is watching others -- (my little demented humor I guess). It is good to know that we can always find a place of rest, comfort and steady ground in conversation with our Lord and His word. IF you need a steady place to land for a while today, try Acts. chapters 25-28 can help. Paul's' divine disorientations and detours always led to Conversions and Healing. :)
Have a wonderful day...we will be wobbling around mud puddles today -- occasionally enjoying a good jump in one! What fun!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
News spreads fast #3
An older article on positive gossip....now called BUZZ.... thought it was relevant. ;0
Enjoy!
By Tim Stevens, executive pastor of Granger Community Church in Granger, Indiana.
2007
What's Buzz?
We live in a world of buzz. Perhaps you've seen the Yahoo! Buzz Index—a daily log of what people are searching for on the Internet, or maybe you've participated in an online forum because you bought a new digital camera and wanted to find out more about it. Buzz is what happens when you blog about your recent experience at a Honda dealership. Buzz is what happens when the message isn't approved by your board or your marketing department or your publications team. Buzz is what happens when normal people talk to others about you, about your product, about what you're doing.
Mark Hughes is the author of Buzz Marketing (Portfolio, 2005). In that book, he lists six things that people talk about: the unusual, the outrageous, the taboo, the hilarious, the remarkable, and the secretive. Those are the things that get us buzzing. Good buzz, Hughes says, is rooted in emotion, in subjects that make us surprised or thrilled, and in things that make us gasp and say, You would never believe this; you wouldn't believe what happened.
Those are the kinds of things we buzz about.
In his book Good to Great (Collins, 2001), Jim Collins says a transformation happens as you push a giant, heavy flywheel in one direction. It takes a lot of energy to get a flywheel moving, but with a consistent effort, the wheel turns two times, then five, then ten, building increasing momentum until … Bang! The wheel hits the breakthrough point and momentum kicks in its favor. Well this happens in churches too. And with some work, our churches can get the buzz flywheel working.
I believe there are three ingredients to generating buzz: beliefs, impact, and language.1. Beliefs
Emanuel Rosen, author of The Anatomy of Buzz (Currency, 2002), says that buzz is more popular now than ever for three reasons: (1) There is so much noise in the advertising world, people have filtered out corporations and their advertisements; (2) People don't trust large organizations, so they refuse to look to them for information; and (3) People are connected—they don't need companies, churches, or other organizations; they can get all the information they need from each other on the Internet. Holding these three beliefs about people is the first step toward understanding and creating buzz.
Another factor—and the motivation behind generating buzz—is your beliefs about people. And these you just can't fake. You need to believe at your core that people matter to God, that it is important for people to meet God and to come into relationship with him. We don't want to generate buzz so that people will look at us and say, Man, you're really innovative. You're really cool. You're really creative. God is the only one who is worthy of buzz. We don't want the attention of the community unless we're confident that it's going to point people toward God.
Beliefs about people only get us so far; we need to learn what makes buzz happen—so that our churches can generate their own buzz.
2. Impact
The second ingredient to buzz—after holding the right beliefs about people—is that it only happens if you're having an impact. I'm convinced that most churches don't create buzz today, or can't sustain buzz, because they have very little impact. To have an impact is to have an immediate and strong effect on something or somebody. And every year there are events that happen locally, nationally, and globally that have a huge impact.
But where is the impact of the church as a whole, or of your church in particular? Would anyone notice if your church stopped meeting? I don't mean the 200 or 800 or 8,000 that go to your church. I'm sure they would feel the impact. But the people that drive by, the people in the community—would they feel a difference? Making an impact produces buzz, but your community can only feel your impact if you're speaking the right language. (Related Video: Making an impact as a church)
3. Language
A lot of people are tired of hearing this, but it's the third ingredient in creating buzz. We need to speak the right language. This means more than toning down the religious jargon we use, adding drama, and incorporating contemporary worship. In fact, it's possible to have great drama and video and contemporary music and still be producing a service that the unchurched can't even understand—it makes no sense to them. In order to speak the right language and reach more people, many churches need an entirely different filter.
Filters are important. They are the means by which we understand the messages that are sent to us. We all have multiple filters that are in place. Many people have family filters, and can't think about family issues without recollecting the brokenness of their childhood home. Others have consumer filters; they have strong feelings about certain products and the people who use them. Some people think that the church is all about getting people's money, and they use that filter to judge pastors and churches.
There is a filter we hardly ever talk about. It affects the language that we use to have an impact. It's a filter that is very strong in today's society. In fact, I think this filter has an impact on our entire culture, and no matter where your church is located in the United States or in Canada this filter impacts you. This filter is called pop culture.
Churches need to be able to speak in the language of pop culture and communicate the Bible in and with this strange new culture. In a sense, we need to become cross-cultural missionaries. Like missionaries, we must dwell in the culture and use the language, the signs, and the symbols of that culture to reach people. Rather than embracing pop culture, this means we must leverage it. (Related Video: Church attitudes toward pop culture)
This is important because speaking someone's language is the first step toward gaining a hearing from them.
Remind Me Why We're Doing This
To get the buzz flywheel turning will take a lot of effort, especially if you need to make significant changes before you can get started. But if you have the right beliefs about people and you use the right language, your church will begin to make a community-wide impact. Once you're there, the buzz flywheel kicks in, building its own momentum.
Of course, the buzz can be sustained only if your church is doing that to which it has been called: working to change lives. That's what it's all about, and we must never lose sight of our task: effective ministry, introducing people to Christ, helping men and women take steps toward him.
Enjoy!
By Tim Stevens, executive pastor of Granger Community Church in Granger, Indiana.
2007
What's Buzz?
We live in a world of buzz. Perhaps you've seen the Yahoo! Buzz Index—a daily log of what people are searching for on the Internet, or maybe you've participated in an online forum because you bought a new digital camera and wanted to find out more about it. Buzz is what happens when you blog about your recent experience at a Honda dealership. Buzz is what happens when the message isn't approved by your board or your marketing department or your publications team. Buzz is what happens when normal people talk to others about you, about your product, about what you're doing.
Mark Hughes is the author of Buzz Marketing (Portfolio, 2005). In that book, he lists six things that people talk about: the unusual, the outrageous, the taboo, the hilarious, the remarkable, and the secretive. Those are the things that get us buzzing. Good buzz, Hughes says, is rooted in emotion, in subjects that make us surprised or thrilled, and in things that make us gasp and say, You would never believe this; you wouldn't believe what happened.
Those are the kinds of things we buzz about.
In his book Good to Great (Collins, 2001), Jim Collins says a transformation happens as you push a giant, heavy flywheel in one direction. It takes a lot of energy to get a flywheel moving, but with a consistent effort, the wheel turns two times, then five, then ten, building increasing momentum until … Bang! The wheel hits the breakthrough point and momentum kicks in its favor. Well this happens in churches too. And with some work, our churches can get the buzz flywheel working.
I believe there are three ingredients to generating buzz: beliefs, impact, and language.1. Beliefs
Emanuel Rosen, author of The Anatomy of Buzz (Currency, 2002), says that buzz is more popular now than ever for three reasons: (1) There is so much noise in the advertising world, people have filtered out corporations and their advertisements; (2) People don't trust large organizations, so they refuse to look to them for information; and (3) People are connected—they don't need companies, churches, or other organizations; they can get all the information they need from each other on the Internet. Holding these three beliefs about people is the first step toward understanding and creating buzz.
Another factor—and the motivation behind generating buzz—is your beliefs about people. And these you just can't fake. You need to believe at your core that people matter to God, that it is important for people to meet God and to come into relationship with him. We don't want to generate buzz so that people will look at us and say, Man, you're really innovative. You're really cool. You're really creative. God is the only one who is worthy of buzz. We don't want the attention of the community unless we're confident that it's going to point people toward God.
Beliefs about people only get us so far; we need to learn what makes buzz happen—so that our churches can generate their own buzz.
2. Impact
The second ingredient to buzz—after holding the right beliefs about people—is that it only happens if you're having an impact. I'm convinced that most churches don't create buzz today, or can't sustain buzz, because they have very little impact. To have an impact is to have an immediate and strong effect on something or somebody. And every year there are events that happen locally, nationally, and globally that have a huge impact.
But where is the impact of the church as a whole, or of your church in particular? Would anyone notice if your church stopped meeting? I don't mean the 200 or 800 or 8,000 that go to your church. I'm sure they would feel the impact. But the people that drive by, the people in the community—would they feel a difference? Making an impact produces buzz, but your community can only feel your impact if you're speaking the right language. (Related Video: Making an impact as a church)
3. Language
A lot of people are tired of hearing this, but it's the third ingredient in creating buzz. We need to speak the right language. This means more than toning down the religious jargon we use, adding drama, and incorporating contemporary worship. In fact, it's possible to have great drama and video and contemporary music and still be producing a service that the unchurched can't even understand—it makes no sense to them. In order to speak the right language and reach more people, many churches need an entirely different filter.
Filters are important. They are the means by which we understand the messages that are sent to us. We all have multiple filters that are in place. Many people have family filters, and can't think about family issues without recollecting the brokenness of their childhood home. Others have consumer filters; they have strong feelings about certain products and the people who use them. Some people think that the church is all about getting people's money, and they use that filter to judge pastors and churches.
There is a filter we hardly ever talk about. It affects the language that we use to have an impact. It's a filter that is very strong in today's society. In fact, I think this filter has an impact on our entire culture, and no matter where your church is located in the United States or in Canada this filter impacts you. This filter is called pop culture.
Churches need to be able to speak in the language of pop culture and communicate the Bible in and with this strange new culture. In a sense, we need to become cross-cultural missionaries. Like missionaries, we must dwell in the culture and use the language, the signs, and the symbols of that culture to reach people. Rather than embracing pop culture, this means we must leverage it. (Related Video: Church attitudes toward pop culture)
This is important because speaking someone's language is the first step toward gaining a hearing from them.
Remind Me Why We're Doing This
To get the buzz flywheel turning will take a lot of effort, especially if you need to make significant changes before you can get started. But if you have the right beliefs about people and you use the right language, your church will begin to make a community-wide impact. Once you're there, the buzz flywheel kicks in, building its own momentum.
Of course, the buzz can be sustained only if your church is doing that to which it has been called: working to change lives. That's what it's all about, and we must never lose sight of our task: effective ministry, introducing people to Christ, helping men and women take steps toward him.
News spreads fast #2
I recently shared a blog post by Seth Godin that I liked with the leadership team I am a part of at my church. We all agreed with it's principle and I think it relates to any sharing of information good or bad and thought you might find it interesting too. Especially when trying to share the great news of the Gospel....
First, ten
"This, in two words, is the secret of the new marketing. Find ten people. Ten people who trust you/respect you/need you/listen to you...Those ten people need what you have to sell, or want it. And if they love it, you win. If they love it, they'll each find you ten more people (or a hundred or a thousand or, perhaps, just three). Repeat. If they don't love it, you need a new product. Start over. Your idea spreads. Your business grows. Not as fast as you want, but faster than you could ever imagine.This approach changes the posture and timing of everything you do.You can no longer market to the anonymous masses. They're not anonymous and they're not masses. You can only market to people who are willing participants. Like this group of ten.The timing means that the idea of a 'launch' and press releases and the big unveiling is nuts. Instead, plan on the gradual build that turns into a tidal wave. Organize for it and spend money appropriately. The fact is, the curve of money spent (big hump, then it tails off) is precisely backwards to what you actually need.Three years from now, this advice will be so common as to be boring. Today, it's almost certainly the opposite of what you're doing."
MY THOUGHTS: Word of mouth is contagious --- We each have a circle of influence -- probably 10 or more people we talk with on a weekly basis. Let's get excited about something great going on in our churches and spread the vision of what the Lord is doing there! Maybe that can be caught and spread faster ---and stop the negative talk that seems to penetrate our conversations (and consequently, all that the world outside the church hears about).
love you all!
Amanda
First, ten
"This, in two words, is the secret of the new marketing. Find ten people. Ten people who trust you/respect you/need you/listen to you...Those ten people need what you have to sell, or want it. And if they love it, you win. If they love it, they'll each find you ten more people (or a hundred or a thousand or, perhaps, just three). Repeat. If they don't love it, you need a new product. Start over. Your idea spreads. Your business grows. Not as fast as you want, but faster than you could ever imagine.This approach changes the posture and timing of everything you do.You can no longer market to the anonymous masses. They're not anonymous and they're not masses. You can only market to people who are willing participants. Like this group of ten.The timing means that the idea of a 'launch' and press releases and the big unveiling is nuts. Instead, plan on the gradual build that turns into a tidal wave. Organize for it and spend money appropriately. The fact is, the curve of money spent (big hump, then it tails off) is precisely backwards to what you actually need.Three years from now, this advice will be so common as to be boring. Today, it's almost certainly the opposite of what you're doing."
MY THOUGHTS: Word of mouth is contagious --- We each have a circle of influence -- probably 10 or more people we talk with on a weekly basis. Let's get excited about something great going on in our churches and spread the vision of what the Lord is doing there! Maybe that can be caught and spread faster ---and stop the negative talk that seems to penetrate our conversations (and consequently, all that the world outside the church hears about).
love you all!
Amanda
News spreads fast...#1
I am always amazed when a person has told me some tid-bit of news and that famous "EVERYONE thinks this is negative" comment comes up- usually in conjunction with a person who is not doing something to their liking. Who is everyone anyway, and since when does everyone mean just two or three people...and why do the 'tellers of news" want to keep their sources of information a secret to "protect their privacy"? That is just Bologna!
Fact: When information is dispensed...someone will always misunderstand it.
Fact: The misunderstood information ALWAYS spreads faster than the actual truth.
Why?
Why is it that we as a human race are more apt to spread negative information than positive? Why does it take extra effort to encourage rather than discourage?
Why do leaders seem to have to encourage others to encourage others?
Our mission as a relational people:
Love one another, as Christ loved you.
Love your neighbor as yourself.
If we are doing this...then encouragement should be passed faster than negative false gossip. Who wants to hang with those who complain about everything anyway? That is just no fun.
If you can't say anything nice... ah, you know the rest.
Amanda
Fact: When information is dispensed...someone will always misunderstand it.
Fact: The misunderstood information ALWAYS spreads faster than the actual truth.
Why?
Why is it that we as a human race are more apt to spread negative information than positive? Why does it take extra effort to encourage rather than discourage?
Why do leaders seem to have to encourage others to encourage others?
Our mission as a relational people:
Love one another, as Christ loved you.
Love your neighbor as yourself.
If we are doing this...then encouragement should be passed faster than negative false gossip. Who wants to hang with those who complain about everything anyway? That is just no fun.
If you can't say anything nice... ah, you know the rest.
Amanda
Monday, April 27, 2009
Random conversations with Jesus
I have been spending quite a bit of time in my car lately -- which has allowed even more extra time to spend in conversation with Jesus. His words of encouragement lately have been an amazing gift -- although simple messages, for a brain that works like mine -- it seems Jesus tends to remind me of these most often.
1. No matter where you go, I am there with you. You are never alone while working for me.
2. If I am for you, who can be against you? I am greater than any trouble, or strife you could even think up in your over-analyzing brain! And...don't try, you will never be able to logically out-think me.
3. If you really mess up and make some mistakes today, I will still love you as much as I love you right now.
4. Be yourself -- only when you are honest and transparent among friends, can I minister to them through you...
5. Always be alert, ready and able to speak about the Love I have placed in your heart -- and you can make a difference in a life... --
6. I am in control -- not you. Quit trying to run things that are not able to be ran by human hands. A life of Peace is only found in giving control every day--
7. You may have to reach out first...others are not always interested in friendships with those close to me...you can intimidate them. Be gentle, and loving and ask questions about them.
1. No matter where you go, I am there with you. You are never alone while working for me.
2. If I am for you, who can be against you? I am greater than any trouble, or strife you could even think up in your over-analyzing brain! And...don't try, you will never be able to logically out-think me.
3. If you really mess up and make some mistakes today, I will still love you as much as I love you right now.
4. Be yourself -- only when you are honest and transparent among friends, can I minister to them through you...
5. Always be alert, ready and able to speak about the Love I have placed in your heart -- and you can make a difference in a life... --
6. I am in control -- not you. Quit trying to run things that are not able to be ran by human hands. A life of Peace is only found in giving control every day--
7. You may have to reach out first...others are not always interested in friendships with those close to me...you can intimidate them. Be gentle, and loving and ask questions about them.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
My God is bigger
In the last several months, my kids have been playing a bit of a learning game with us. Usually, as we drive in the car, the kids try to think of the biggest, oldest or strongest thing they can imagine and ask us if God is bigger. It goes something like this:
Child - "Mommy, is God bigger than the ocean?"
Mommy - "God is indeed bigger than the ocean...he made the ocean."
Child - Mommy, is God stronger than superman?
Mommy - God is even stronger than superman.
Child - Is God older than Daddy?
Mommy - God is even older than Daddy, He always has been and always will be.
Then one time I heard and answered the next question -- and had to chuckle at their reaction.
Child - Is God even older than Pappy?
Mommy - God is older than pappy, He always has been and always will be.
Child -- WOOOOWWWW, That is OLD!
(poor pappy, he didn't think it was so funny we told him.)
The faith of my children through their perspective always amazes me. But the simple truth is that the Lord is larger than life itself. He is hard for us to even put in perspective through our intellectual brains, hard to rely on all that He is capable of providing and hard to fit all of his love into our small and inadequate hearts. If we had a God that we could completely understand and completely explain, I am not sure I would follow him... We are so limited in our view of how Awesome and Capable our Lord really is, that we even now still have trouble placing all of our lives, all that we love and hold dear, into his Hands to control.
My prayer today, is that my friends and family will experience the Grace that sets them free, His love that holds no conditions and His Amazing adventure He has called us to embrace.
love ya!
Amanda
Child - "Mommy, is God bigger than the ocean?"
Mommy - "God is indeed bigger than the ocean...he made the ocean."
Child - Mommy, is God stronger than superman?
Mommy - God is even stronger than superman.
Child - Is God older than Daddy?
Mommy - God is even older than Daddy, He always has been and always will be.
Then one time I heard and answered the next question -- and had to chuckle at their reaction.
Child - Is God even older than Pappy?
Mommy - God is older than pappy, He always has been and always will be.
Child -- WOOOOWWWW, That is OLD!
(poor pappy, he didn't think it was so funny we told him.)
The faith of my children through their perspective always amazes me. But the simple truth is that the Lord is larger than life itself. He is hard for us to even put in perspective through our intellectual brains, hard to rely on all that He is capable of providing and hard to fit all of his love into our small and inadequate hearts. If we had a God that we could completely understand and completely explain, I am not sure I would follow him... We are so limited in our view of how Awesome and Capable our Lord really is, that we even now still have trouble placing all of our lives, all that we love and hold dear, into his Hands to control.
My prayer today, is that my friends and family will experience the Grace that sets them free, His love that holds no conditions and His Amazing adventure He has called us to embrace.
love ya!
Amanda
Thursday, March 5, 2009
The Ultimate Healer
What an amazing God we serve! It has been a long time since I have posted, due to the fact that I have been quite ill recently with what was thought as Fibro Myalgia as I was diagnosed a year ago next month. HOWEVER!!!! I love saying that....
Since a lot of people have been asking about what is going on, why i have spurts off of facebook and not been writing on my blog, I thought i would start at the beginning and inform everyone at the same time of what is going on and my update as of today!
This all began with sudden pain in my lower back and abdomen area that seemed to hop and skip to different spots around my stomach and bowls about two years ago. I have earlier in life been diagnosed with an irritable bowl condition that acts up during stressful times. I first went to see my new family doctor, who took me off all medications that I was currently taking to see if it was the meds that were the problem. Without my dosage of meds that I normally took, I took a turn for the worse, and became very tired, and unable to communicate effectively as well as sunk into a bit of a depression caused by the pain. My family doctor finally put me on the dosages that I began with, and due to the fact that my sed rates were extremely high and I had gained 30+ pounds in two months, he sent me to an endocrinologist Once seeing the endocronologist and finding nothing there, I was sent to a rheumatologist, again because of my sed rates being so high as an indicator of infection or inflammation. My rheumatologist began a medication regiment to help ease the pain and help me lead a more normal life. As the pain medications began to work, and I felt quite a bit better, he then diagnosed me with stress induced Fibro Myalgia - a condition that effects the muscle and tendon connections causing pain. No one knows why anyone gets this, and there is no cure. So, you are on medication for the rest of your life.
Last month I was experiencing more pain than normal in my abdomen and although I am on medication (high doses of vicatin in fact), nothing seemed to take care of all of the pain. For three days I was down, and only was able to get through it during sleep with the help of my muscle relaxers. After three days of this, I decided this wasn't the normal fibro myalgia acting up, but had to be something wrong. After calling the rhumetologist and was told to go to my family doctor for an ultra sound, I went to see our family doctor and was given an ultra sound and a upper GI test. The ultra sound verified that my gallbladder had VERY large stones at the neck and my doctor said that it would probably be the cause of my pain and should come out as soon as possible. After seeing a surgical consult and being told that if I were to go through with the surgery that I would have a 70 percent chance of complete healing of all pain, we decided to go for it! My doctor also stated that he was not arrogant enough to say that the diagnosis of fybro myalgia could be pre-mature, but that it is definitely possible that this surgery could cure all of the current pain.
I was scheduled for surgery and it went very well. I had made it and I wasn't nervous until the Dr. started my first iv. I had told him I was a little nervous, he smiled and said it will be OK, and that is the last thing I remember until I woke up in recovery telling the nurse that I was concerned she was having a bad day because she wasn't smiling very much. :) she perked up after that and told me it was her third 12 in a row, and just needed a day off...so pray for her if you can remember.
My surgeon was great...and said that despite what the test results were, I DID have imflamation of the gallbladder and that we were wise to get it out when we did. He also said that my stone was so large that he had to cut a larger incision to actually get it out through my belly button! Every thing else looked good, expect he could confirm for me that I might still have a bit of irritable bowel syndrome, but nothing that couldn't be controlled with diet and meds.
I am doing well recovering at home---AND HAVE NO PAIN THAT I HAD HAD BEFORE! PRAISE GOD! However, due to the fact I have been on heavy doses narcotics for the last 18 months for pain, I am in a 5-7 (day 5 is today) day rough detox period -cold turkey- to get my body used to not taking them any longer. Then will be in a easier detox for about a month to rid my body of everything. It sounds weird to me and almost unbelievable that I have to detox and go through withdrawal from the pain meds..., but I have NO pain and it seems that the surgery has been successful in getting rid of every problem thus far -- except for this recovery period to get off the pain medication safely. There are some minor side effects (shakes, chills, trouble sleeping and some unmentionables that I wont share) --- BUT, once this period is finished we are confident that I should be back to normal (whatever that is) and doing really well.
Day 5 today - I have had a wonderful day and spring cleaned 3 rooms in my house with two preschoolers and a big baby puppy running everywhere! Took it easy this evening but feel great. I really can't believe or begin to explain the difference--and that is WITH the side effects from the withdrawal! God is truly amazing!
This for me is a huge answer to prayer. Some at the beginning of this process thought it was all in my head and called me(and still think) I am mentally ill -- (hahahaha) however, I know different - and now the doctors have found proof of that fact! I praise my Lord for how he works to heal and make us completely whole - even with missing body parts!!!
Thanks to all of you who have supported me in this process and journey to this point. I am excited to get back to real life living and writing more on my blog!
Since a lot of people have been asking about what is going on, why i have spurts off of facebook and not been writing on my blog, I thought i would start at the beginning and inform everyone at the same time of what is going on and my update as of today!
This all began with sudden pain in my lower back and abdomen area that seemed to hop and skip to different spots around my stomach and bowls about two years ago. I have earlier in life been diagnosed with an irritable bowl condition that acts up during stressful times. I first went to see my new family doctor, who took me off all medications that I was currently taking to see if it was the meds that were the problem. Without my dosage of meds that I normally took, I took a turn for the worse, and became very tired, and unable to communicate effectively as well as sunk into a bit of a depression caused by the pain. My family doctor finally put me on the dosages that I began with, and due to the fact that my sed rates were extremely high and I had gained 30+ pounds in two months, he sent me to an endocrinologist Once seeing the endocronologist and finding nothing there, I was sent to a rheumatologist, again because of my sed rates being so high as an indicator of infection or inflammation. My rheumatologist began a medication regiment to help ease the pain and help me lead a more normal life. As the pain medications began to work, and I felt quite a bit better, he then diagnosed me with stress induced Fibro Myalgia - a condition that effects the muscle and tendon connections causing pain. No one knows why anyone gets this, and there is no cure. So, you are on medication for the rest of your life.
Last month I was experiencing more pain than normal in my abdomen and although I am on medication (high doses of vicatin in fact), nothing seemed to take care of all of the pain. For three days I was down, and only was able to get through it during sleep with the help of my muscle relaxers. After three days of this, I decided this wasn't the normal fibro myalgia acting up, but had to be something wrong. After calling the rhumetologist and was told to go to my family doctor for an ultra sound, I went to see our family doctor and was given an ultra sound and a upper GI test. The ultra sound verified that my gallbladder had VERY large stones at the neck and my doctor said that it would probably be the cause of my pain and should come out as soon as possible. After seeing a surgical consult and being told that if I were to go through with the surgery that I would have a 70 percent chance of complete healing of all pain, we decided to go for it! My doctor also stated that he was not arrogant enough to say that the diagnosis of fybro myalgia could be pre-mature, but that it is definitely possible that this surgery could cure all of the current pain.
I was scheduled for surgery and it went very well. I had made it and I wasn't nervous until the Dr. started my first iv. I had told him I was a little nervous, he smiled and said it will be OK, and that is the last thing I remember until I woke up in recovery telling the nurse that I was concerned she was having a bad day because she wasn't smiling very much. :) she perked up after that and told me it was her third 12 in a row, and just needed a day off...so pray for her if you can remember.
My surgeon was great...and said that despite what the test results were, I DID have imflamation of the gallbladder and that we were wise to get it out when we did. He also said that my stone was so large that he had to cut a larger incision to actually get it out through my belly button! Every thing else looked good, expect he could confirm for me that I might still have a bit of irritable bowel syndrome, but nothing that couldn't be controlled with diet and meds.
I am doing well recovering at home---AND HAVE NO PAIN THAT I HAD HAD BEFORE! PRAISE GOD! However, due to the fact I have been on heavy doses narcotics for the last 18 months for pain, I am in a 5-7 (day 5 is today) day rough detox period -cold turkey- to get my body used to not taking them any longer. Then will be in a easier detox for about a month to rid my body of everything. It sounds weird to me and almost unbelievable that I have to detox and go through withdrawal from the pain meds..., but I have NO pain and it seems that the surgery has been successful in getting rid of every problem thus far -- except for this recovery period to get off the pain medication safely. There are some minor side effects (shakes, chills, trouble sleeping and some unmentionables that I wont share) --- BUT, once this period is finished we are confident that I should be back to normal (whatever that is) and doing really well.
Day 5 today - I have had a wonderful day and spring cleaned 3 rooms in my house with two preschoolers and a big baby puppy running everywhere! Took it easy this evening but feel great. I really can't believe or begin to explain the difference--and that is WITH the side effects from the withdrawal! God is truly amazing!
This for me is a huge answer to prayer. Some at the beginning of this process thought it was all in my head and called me(and still think) I am mentally ill -- (hahahaha) however, I know different - and now the doctors have found proof of that fact! I praise my Lord for how he works to heal and make us completely whole - even with missing body parts!!!
Thanks to all of you who have supported me in this process and journey to this point. I am excited to get back to real life living and writing more on my blog!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Welcome to 2009
We rang in the new year at the Durbin family by putting the kids to bed at 9pm, and watching House episodes online until midnight. I believe Eric rolled over (had been asleep and snoring) kissed me and said, "happy new year baby"--then rolled back over and went back to sleep!! We are definitely the lively bunch eh?! Party like its 2009! Ah, Prince...(formally known as, the sign we couldn't ever explain...) we miss the 80's!
As I reflect on the year, and how life has evolved in the Durbin family -- All I can say really is, "Praise God, we are loved." We have been through several transitions these last couple of years, and we have found that our true friends still love and care for us. They still pray with us, they still cry with us and they share our joys with us. True friends are rare in ministry -- but, I can honestly say, we have some of the best people, with the largest hearts for our friends. You all know who you are -- and I say Thank you.
My goals this year are purely relational in context. They are interpersonal in perspective. I have in many years past been a friend to many -- usually with an agenda. Not a bad agenda...one with a kingdom goal in mind usually...(can't say always), but with expectations. One could argue reasonably that they were "results oriented friendships". This is probably one of the hazards of ministry leadership. The "if you...then I will" not unconditional but conditional love. I am not convinced that this is true friendship. Now, I did love all of them. Cared for all of them and they usually knew it -- but they also knew I had expectations, and high ones at that - and some often felt that they wouldn't ever measure up. Thus, this year my goals are not numerical, can't really be measured by any metrical system or quantitative means...but purely in meaningful blessings that probably won't be noticed by me until I reach heaven - and my Lord looks in my eyes and says "well done, my good and faithful servant." -- So what are they??? Let's list them...(I LOVE Lists!)
1. Reach out to people I do not know in a meaningful way. At least one a week. (oops..numerical..can't seem to get away from measurable goals! ugh!)
2. Deepen and enrich the new relationships I currently have in my life.
3. Communicate love and genuine concern for friends I have had throughout my life.
4. Love my family (ugh, all of them) and communicate this in an effective way.
5. Hug and kiss my kids every day and tell them I love them.
6. Communicate affectionately, in my husband's love language, how much I am in love with him and how that love grows each passing minute by showing him how much I respect his leadership, his Daddy's heart and his ability to provide for our family through his passions and spiritual giftings.
OK -- now they are in print. Accountability begins. I will update you on how things are going...you as my readers and followers are probably my friends as well -- so, you are my best audience and accountability! I love and care for you! (oops...the agenda again...not bribing you to say I am doing well!!!!! I promise!)
I hope you enjoy reading. I love writing!
As I reflect on the year, and how life has evolved in the Durbin family -- All I can say really is, "Praise God, we are loved." We have been through several transitions these last couple of years, and we have found that our true friends still love and care for us. They still pray with us, they still cry with us and they share our joys with us. True friends are rare in ministry -- but, I can honestly say, we have some of the best people, with the largest hearts for our friends. You all know who you are -- and I say Thank you.
My goals this year are purely relational in context. They are interpersonal in perspective. I have in many years past been a friend to many -- usually with an agenda. Not a bad agenda...one with a kingdom goal in mind usually...(can't say always), but with expectations. One could argue reasonably that they were "results oriented friendships". This is probably one of the hazards of ministry leadership. The "if you...then I will" not unconditional but conditional love. I am not convinced that this is true friendship. Now, I did love all of them. Cared for all of them and they usually knew it -- but they also knew I had expectations, and high ones at that - and some often felt that they wouldn't ever measure up. Thus, this year my goals are not numerical, can't really be measured by any metrical system or quantitative means...but purely in meaningful blessings that probably won't be noticed by me until I reach heaven - and my Lord looks in my eyes and says "well done, my good and faithful servant." -- So what are they??? Let's list them...(I LOVE Lists!)
1. Reach out to people I do not know in a meaningful way. At least one a week. (oops..numerical..can't seem to get away from measurable goals! ugh!)
2. Deepen and enrich the new relationships I currently have in my life.
3. Communicate love and genuine concern for friends I have had throughout my life.
4. Love my family (ugh, all of them) and communicate this in an effective way.
5. Hug and kiss my kids every day and tell them I love them.
6. Communicate affectionately, in my husband's love language, how much I am in love with him and how that love grows each passing minute by showing him how much I respect his leadership, his Daddy's heart and his ability to provide for our family through his passions and spiritual giftings.
OK -- now they are in print. Accountability begins. I will update you on how things are going...you as my readers and followers are probably my friends as well -- so, you are my best audience and accountability! I love and care for you! (oops...the agenda again...not bribing you to say I am doing well!!!!! I promise!)
I hope you enjoy reading. I love writing!
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